Wednesday, April 9, 2014

The Top 5 Worst Things About Wedding Planning

Ok, I realize everyone is going to have different experiences planning their wedding and that not all weddings are the same.  But let's get real here folks.  It's not all fun and games, you WILL get frustrated at some point. Now, I am not the type of person to get mad and scream at someone, I usually just brush it off my shoulders and move on.  However, there have been times where it has crossed my mind (although I still never did anything about it.)
When I first started planning, I had family and friends ask constantly what they can do to help and honestly there wasn't anything I needed.  Plus being the crafty perfectionist that I am, I didn't trust anyone to take on certain tasks with the fear that they would mess them up.  Not only that, I like things done MY way.
1. How Much They ACTUALLY Cost
Yeah Yeah, you set a budget and think you're going to stick to it?  Chances are you may be close, but expect a ton of extra costs you never even thought of. Trust me, it WILL happen.   You think all of those DIY projects are saving you money?  Yes, some will, but some may even end up costing more than you would have if you just purchased them yourself.  And think about all that time you spent on it too.  Also keep in mind that if you chose a hotel as your venue, the added hotel costs and taxes that come along with it.  Not only that, but your guest list will be the majority of your cost, see #3 below.
2. People want to see photos of your dress
I understand you are just as excited as I am that I said Yes to the dress, but I don't want to show everyone from your cousins sisters boyfriends grandmothers dog my dress.   I want to save the "shock factor" for my wedding day.  You can show your cousins sisters boyfriends grandmothers dog my dress after I say, "I do," thank you very much.

3. Creating a Guest List I thought this would be the easiest part.  You know, inviting everyone you've ever met and their plus ones and so on.  Ok I kid, but you don't realize how many people "assume" they are invited to your wedding and assume they are allowed to bring their booty call from the night before.  I get that you don't want to come to the wedding "alone," but what made you think you were invited in the first place?  The guest list is the most important because you need to invite family and close friends.  People get seriously butt hurt when they are not invited.  You can't disappoint Aunt Sue, yet you also need to keep in mind that this is where the majority of your costs add up.  If you have 100 guests you are inviting, think about the plus ones that go along with that and how much the per plate cost is PLUS each chair and table you need to have, PLUS drinks, PLUS extra space so that everyone can fit and that extra centerpiece you need to either buy or make to add to that extra table, oh and don't forget that extra tablecloth you will need for that extra table. Oh and we cannot forget about those extra invitations you needed to order for all those extra people. (Plus the added postage for each invite plus the postage you need to put on the return RSVP card). Yes, my friends, it adds up.. and it adds up quick.

4. People who act as if I "should" be stressed
First of all, I am not one to usually stress about things.  Yes little things here and there but nothing major.  People are constantly asking me if I am stressed.   Why the hell should I be stressed?  I understand this is a wedding, but did we all forget the true meaning of "marriage?"  Don't worry about me peeps. I am doing better than ever! I get to marry my best friend, someone I can count on, someone I can trust with anything. Yes I understand there are plenty of tasks I need to have accomplished for my coordinator, DJ, officiant, and I understand the timelines, but I don't need to stress as if this is a college final and that my marriage would fail if I don't complete what I needed in time. I realize not everything will go as planned and to be honest, I probably won't even realize it the day of the Wedding.  Anything else that happens that day that was not supposed to I will think of as an added bonus. 
5. Thinking your wedding party will know what to do It's definitely been a roller coaster planning with the wedding party.  I guess I always assumed every single one of them would be just as excited as I am and want to jump on board and help plan.  Not necessarily the case.  Yes you will have a few who don't care as much as you do, but you may have at least one who goes above and beyond what's expected.  As long as you have that one (whether it be a bridesmaid, groomsman, or your mom) that is all you need.  Don't expect your bridesmaids to drop their lives for you.  They won't.  If they aren't doing the work for your bachelorette or bridal shower festivities, you may need to jump on board. (I did)  Just expect to do things yourself.
I completely understand that not everything will go as planned, but in the end I will still be married to my best friend and my family will still love me.  So what if my dress rips or I trip over Uncle Bobs big toe, at least we will all have a story to talk about for years! To everyone out there that looks at me like I should be losing my mind, don't.  In just a few short months this will all be over, the wedding will have come and gone. I will be happily married and laugh about anything that wasn't 100% perfect. In fact, I look forward to the imperfections that I know are bound to happen, at least it will give us enjoyable stories!  For myself, I am focusing on planning my perfect marriage, not a perfect wedding day. (Because we all know "perfect" doesn't exist.)
Linking up for Wedding Wednesday.


  1. Girl, been there done that. The list is one of the hardest parts, because you have old friends, but lots of new couple friends too and if you both have big families, oh vey. Our original invite list was 225 people! 225! GOODNESS right? But, we had a bunch of people that couldn't come so it became a much more manageable number.

    And yes, if girls/guys haven't been in weddings before it's a true wake up call. I was lucky, all of my bmaids/moh had been in weddings before and knew what to do. But i've had a few friends that had clueless bridal parties, oh vey that's no fun. Glad you have the one above and beyond helping you out.

    Excited for you!

  2. Yes to all of these! The first time I was a bridesmaid I was completely unaware of the cost that would go into it, and I kept that in mind while planning my wedding to not expect too much of my girls and tried to choose a cheaper dress and didn't dictate what shoes to wear, etc...

  3. So glad you are not stressed! I was the same way. Everyone kept asking me if I stressed, or saying they had never seen such a calm bride. Even on the wedding day. I was annoyed with everyone asking me, because like you said, it's about marrying the love of your life, not about if every little thing is perfect.

  4. Girl I hate that about the dress too! Element of surprise is key!! Xx.

  5. Currently planning my October wedding and I yelled "exactly!" after I read this! I didn't anticipate the people coming out of the woodwork expecting to be invited. Uhm, I haven't talked to you for 5 years, no, you aren't invited. GR!

  6. Ha We're so alike in the sense that I don't want other people doing anything because I'm afraid they'll "mess it up." Sounds so bratty, but I'm a perfectionist! I completely agree with this list!

  7. Conquering the guest list is my goal this week. I've been avoiding it after the last time I tried to start a list a few weeks ago, and my fiance kept asking "Who's that?" whenever I wrote down one of his cousins' names hahah

  8. This post made me think that I need to make a list of everything that has to happen the day before and the day of the wedding and who I need to do what... that is my project for tomorrow (16 days and counting!). Thanks for the ideas!

  9. That's so great you aren't stressing over the wedding planning. Too often brides get caught up in it all and don't remember to enjoy the small stuff! It's your one and only wedding!

  10. This is so so so true; Especially the one about the dress. Yes, I've found a dress. No you can't see it BEFORE the wedding. My own father hasn't seen it for the wow factor. Yeesh. And also, totally agree about bridal party..

  11. I couldn't agree more! I stuck to not showing my dress for a long time and then gave up because it was so irritating! My biggest pet peeves were the bridal party attendees that didn't know/do what they were supposed to. For one example, we wound up planning our entire bachelorette party and then had to pay $300 towards the bus because the MOH and best man wouldn't pay the difference. They didn't even pay for our spot on the bus! Isnt that just wrong?! My other pet peeve was the people that thought they should be invited as guests and bluntly asked for their invitation. :)

  12. These are very helpful tips! Planning for your big day is really overwhelming, and it can be a pain in the neck sometimes. But this will somewhat lessen the stress for brides-to-be, as they now know what are the things to do and avoid beforehand. And I agree with number 1; that’s where most problem occurs – budget and venue. Hotels are a common choice, as they tend to cover all the reception needs. Though the main concern with that is mostly financial. But I think for those couples who would like to avoid all the troubles planning could ensue, that option would be recommended. Thanks for sharing!

    Marci Deegan @ Twin Pine


I appreciate you taking the time to comment my blog & will do my best to respond to each and every one of you! :) xoxo Lisa Nicole ♥
Please follow my social media accounts
>> facebook// twitter //etsy <<